How I Healed from a Childhood Trauma
I live in Triumph
When I was 14 years old, my mum cut my armpit length hair clean off- like bald!
The reason was that I wanted to wear it out and not have braids (the back and forth, caused her decision) Then she sent me to school next day just like that...you can't imagine what I went through in secondary school. But I was a comedian and I joked it off each day, each week, each month till my hair grew back to a length no one cared about.
But I cared - a trauma.
During that time, I'm not sure what I suffered but I was quiet. I took no photos and went nowhere unless I absolutely needed to, I enjoyed hats let me say that. My mum took one pic and it felt like an eternity waiting for it to be developed so I could destroy it and I did.
Fast forward to 18 and I dyed my hair red (lol we've all done silly experimental things)
My friends at the time said I needed the hairdressers and the hairdressers said I needed to cut my hair. - trigger.
What!? Cut what?! No way! It took hours of convincing and tears but I got a trim LOL
Haggai 2:7-9
"I will shake all the nations, and the treasures of all the nations will be brought to this Temple. I will fill this place with glory, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. The silver is mine, and the gold is mine, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. The future glory of this Temple will be greater than its past glory, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. And in this place I will bring peace. I, the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, have spoken!”
Years on, I've cut my hair a trillion times and deep down inside I'm always saying to myself "You're hair could have been this length or that length" I'm over what happened, forgiven but I had a lot of triggers along the way that I didn't deal with. Though I've realised that with each haircut I chose to do at times I didn't have control or I felt so lost, and it seemed like me choosing to cut the hair on my head was taking control that day when I was 14, and all that came with it.
I know that God restores the new and hair isn't everything but you know looking cute won't hurt haha.
At the end of it -
I can celebrate my triumph
In letting go, overcoming a deep hurt and taking the time to look at the root cause of a feeling or action that shows up in present days.
If we as people, don't take the time to check ourselves and find the root, no matter what it is you will remain at the trauma stage and always be triggered.
Take the time
God loves you.
P.S if I cut my hair...I'm totally fine, the cut life is saucy at times
Be Beautiful and Choose Happiness x
